Thursday, November 13, 2008

DomestiGals Welcome Kyla Bea for More Ring Talk!

Dear Sue & Jen,

I have to say, I really adore the moissanite ring talk you've been engaging in over the past posts, but I can't say that I'm as entirely on the boat as you guys are. I have to voice my opinion! DomestiGal or not, I am thoroughly domestic (and alternately non-domestic) and I will be heard!

I feel like we skipped a step in this discussion, we went from diamonds to moissanite in one move - that's like getting engaged on a second date! And Sue, I thought you didn't even really want the fuss of this formality stuff! Let's at least go on a third date before you guys really commit.

I get that moissanite is great for a whole bunch of reasons - including that the stone in the middle is conflict free. You get a brand new shiny piece of jewlery, and at least part of the appeal is that you have a big stone without the same cost of a big stone. Here is where I get tripped up though: what about the minerals your stones are set in?

Mining is tough, dirty, and extremely environmentally disruptive at the best of times if it's not downright harmful. Unless your moissanite ring is set in recycled gold, it's still harmful to the
environment, and the rings that I've found online really aren't as pocket friendly as I'd thought they would be! Maybe it's because I'm a married girl in my 20s, but there is no way I could find it acceptable for my Mister to throw down $2000+ for a ring, especially if there were no diamonds changing hands.

Knowing where I stood on this, when Mister and I knew we wanted to get married, I started looking at vintage rings.

Okay hear me out!

Has someone else worn them? Maybe. Maybe they were purchased for someone and never accepted. Maybe they were given and never worn. Maybe they were worn for a year and then put into a box again. But once I got over the "someone else factor" - I have to say that vintage
rings hold my heart.

First of all: it's not about cost. Vintage rings are beautifully designed. Rings from the 1920 and 1930 can be simply or exquisitely set - but they are all warm designs with extreme attention to detail that you have to pay $3000+ for in a new, or moissanite, ring.

Second: The cuts of the stones are also more generous - because a lot of the technology that we have just wasn't around you can get a really gorgeous, and big, stone that by today's standards would lose a quarter of a carat just in making the cut more precise. I have to say, I don't really care how precisely cut the stone is - the diamonds really do sparkle the same in a vintage setting.

And of course, my goodness are they cheap. At estate sales and resellers you can get a vintage ring for a fraction of the cost that you would buy new. The designs are warm and detailed, and you can buy them without breaking the bank. The diamonds that you're buying are already in the world, no one's digging them out or making imitation stones, and gold is upcycled if not recycled. How eco-friendly can you get?

My ring Mister used to propose ended up being Mister's Grandmother's ring. The modern designs just didn't work with my sensibilities in the end, and it's worked out perfectly for us. I had the wedding band re-set and they made an awesome pair.

Can I stop being practical and go back to being a girl talking about her wedding for just a second? Here's my engagement ring. It's almost a carat. It's from mister, and I love it. The start of a very good thing.

What do you think? Anyone thinking of taking the vintage plunge?

For more Kyla Bea, check out her fabulous blog! Thank you, Kyla, for adding this new dimension to our ring obsession! XOXO!


Ashley said...

Oh, I adored this post!

I ended up getting a "conflict free" diamond engagement ring (which was lost/'s a sore subject.)

HOWEVER - my wedding ring is from

An amazing website that specializes in recycled gold and jewels. It's fabulous - and you even can offset the carbon that it took to make your ring!

Try that, too! :) (Although I adore Kyla Bea's suggestion - and am wishing I would have thought to look vintage...but with a tiny size 4 finger, it was hard enough to find rings!)

DomestiGals said...

Kyla Bea, Kyla Bea, Kyla Bea!

Wowsers, woman. Thanks so much for hitting a home-run and breaking us in to the vintage ring talk.

You're right, Jen and I are so naughty -- jumping into talking about moissanites and diamonds on the 2nd date before our first kiss.

Your ring is a complete dream! I must admit, I'm turning into more and more of a girl as the days progress. I swear to god I think it's because my ovaries are aging and I'm trying to re-engage with my youth.

Ashley, I can't even imagine how you felt when your ring was lost/stolen. I absolutely must check out -- thank you! (And, darling, you're talking to a fellow size 4 lady here!)


Caz said...

Awesome! Love the bling! This is one of the many reasons why I want a certified Canadian diamond.
Not only is it guaranteed conflict free, but it's also Canadian (like me!) which is hugely important to my identity.

Unfortunately they are more expensive... boo.
I like the idea of recycled metals too, or using a vintage ring as-is or re-setting it. I tend to be drawn to some of the 20's art-deco pieces anyway.

Not that I'm getting engaged anytime soon or anything, I just like to look.

Elizabeth said...

Kyla Bea, your ring is stunning! Unfortunately E and I got so caught up in the hubbub of just being engaged that we didn't put much thought into buying eco-friendly and fair trade jewelry. We did buy from a local jeweler, at least, and the diamond was Canadian. I don't exactly know what the environmental implications of that are. Any jewelry we buy in the future ill certainly reflect those values, though.

Alexis M. said...

I've been back and forth over what I want, I definitely lean toward something vintage simply because it would suit me best.

HOWEVER! Ladies, let's not forget that there are other options besides diamonds! And no, I don't mean moissanite or even cubic zirconia! Has anyone considered other stones, such as sapphires or rubies? Back in the day, different stones symbolized different things and future brides were given something tailored to them that way. Princess Di's ring was a sapphire and I say if it's good enough for Princess Di, well, it's good enough for me!

I began looking around at other stones with this in mind and have completely and irrevocably fallen in love with aquamarine. It's unique enough since pretty much everyone goes with diamonds nowadays, but still traditional because it used to be common!

I did want to go vintage with it, but I was with my beau's sister and tried some on at Zales and now I'm in love with the one I found there.

Another reason it goes in the pro column? Cost! Not nearly as pricey as what I diamond ring it's size would be!

And now I've written a book in your comments so I'll be on my way! You ladies are all absolutely fantastic!

Sher said...

This is totally fabulous. I wish I could have this ring too. Its great to have this kind of engagement ring.

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