Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Lawerly Hotness vs. Grad School Bloat


As I pack to fly back to NYC for your birthday - oh wait. I cannot even believe I will be missing your 30th. Don't even get me started.

So. As I anticipate my trip back to London tonight to work out with Colossus, I have to say I am feeling a little down.

Back when I was a Domestic Goddess, I was working out five or six times a week, cooking three healthy meals a day, getting ten hours of sleep a night, and generally feeling fabulous. As I have previously mentioned, I was totally Colossus' star pupil. I was even doing lunges with free weights heavier than what The Lawyer used! Not that he and I are competitive about this, but I felt fit, strong, and fabulous.

I have now been a DomestiGrad Student for - oh holy crap, has it not even been two months? I should not have done the math - well, it feels like forever. I now strive for three workouts a week. I eat sandwiches for lunch. And sometimes breakfast. And dinner. I haven't had fish for ages and green vegetables are a thing of the past. I get a measly seven hours of sleep on a good night. And I am generally feeling exhausted, puffy, and less fit by the day.

The Lawyer, on the other hand, as you have now seen for yourself, is basically turning into the hottest thing since Nutella came in a pitcher.

I have always believed that couples who are truly MFEO (and if you don't know what that stands for you need to watch "Sleepless in Seattle" ASAP) need to be in the same looks bracket. You know, they need to be at the same level of hotness. As much as two people have in common, or as much as they think they are attracted to each other, if one far surpasses the other in his or her hotness, it just won't last.

Of the men I dated pre-Lawyer, most were in my looks bracket. But some were hotter. And some were notter. And those were always my shortest relationships. 

I know The Lawyer and I are MFEO, but I am worried about his ascent to hotness while I decline into a state of red-eyed bloat. I am trying to eat well, and trying to workout more, but there are only so many hours in the day, you know?

Sue! Ladies! I need a boost! Are there any shortcuts to hotness that I can grasp as I attempt to climb out of my funk? Or is my Looks Bracket Theory just a load of baloney?

Or should I just stop whining?

Yours in tighter pants,


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