Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Lady of Leisure Gets Reprimanded


It’s funny. I had never visited the Tiffany’s website or knew the difference between cushion or princess diamonds before I met you, my beloved Domestic Goddess. To me they all looked the same, and a baguette was something you ate in France, rather than put around your diamond.

My point is this: you are the queen of all this stuff! If anyone can plan a super-duper-icky-cheesy-ridiculously-sweet-making-Domestic-Partner-barf wedding, it’s you!

I think it’s just a minor bump in your journey down the Thames River. You should be taking advantage of making all your girlfriends jealous over the remaining Lady of Leisure months you have! I mean, ew, you are spending your days seeing your trainer, shopping, and then seeing your future hubby in the evenings and boinking him. You’re like all those mummies at our fundraising job that we used to hate because we were so jealous of them.

All will be well soon, not to worry. In the meantime, maybe you can make this wedding planning chaos a bit more fun. For instance, play naked twister, but under each of the circles, have different options for what the appetizers should be. If you fall on a red circle, maybe that means you’ll have duck rather than chicken as the main course.

I don’t know, all this stuff is giving me a big pre-coital headache. This is why I got DPd at the bank.

Onward, DG, onward!


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