Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Gossip and Trollops

Dearest Jen,

I had to take a moment to think about what you were referring to. And then! Thanks to my latest In Touch magazine dirty-guilt-inducing splurge, I had an A-Ha moment. This couple, Penn and Blake, are in this Gossip Girl show, right? I feel so with-it to have known just that.

Sadly, The Doctor and I don't have a T.V. I mean, does this really surprise you? It goes along with our lefty-alterna-couple vibe, no? Actually, no!

Don't get us wrong...

We don't have a T.V. for some lame reason like wanting to make a firm statement against commercialism, reality television shows and the general downward spiral of American Society -- no! Actually, it's because we're totally addicted to television!

You should see us when we're traveling on JetBlue. Our faces are about 2 inches from the television as we greedily digest all the moronic T.V. shows available to us. Of course, I especially like to keep updated with The Hills and all the gossip between Lauren Conrad ($75K/episode), Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag ($65K/episode). Did you get a load of her new music video? Apparently a web server crashed the other day because so many people were trying to view it at the same time.

Ew, okay, I think my brain just rotted from writing this post. Off to continue my cleanse and detox. Today, I'm going to focus on eating copious amounts of fruit, vegetables and probiotics. I mean, wine and coffee are totally okay with a detox, right?

I'll update you on all my bowel movements tomorrow, dear friend!

Shit-Friendly Sue

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