Tuesday, September 30, 2008

DomestiGals and Body Fat

Oops. First of all, when I wrote the subject title I had, "DomestiGals and Body Fart."

Not exactly what our community would really want to hear, I'm sure. That said, I know you're all just dying to hear about our body fat percentages!

Which brings me to my big question for Jen: Now that you're nerding-away in MBA la-la land, is your butt getting bigger?

I mean, I know anytime I've been in school, my butt has definitely expanded.

Jen, are you still going to be seeing Colossus? Tell me more about Bridal Boot Camp rather than Math Boot Camp! Will he still be threatening to take your body fat percentage by pinching the fat AROUND YOUR KNEE? (Isn't he aware that your wedding-dress-of-dreams won't be showing your knees?)

Photo via NYMag.

I have a feeling Colossus thinks your wedding-dress-of-dreams is supposed to look like this:

Photo Courtesy: www.herhighnessness.com

BTW, this seems insane, no? I remember getting body fat percentages done in my high school health class, and my 99 year old teacher squeezing my triceps while encouraging us to draw pictures of testicles. (I'm not joking, we had to draw pictures of testicles. I was so embarrassed, as I had never seen real, live testicles before! But that's another story...)

Back in high school, my body fat percentage was around 24%, which is insane, since I was in a ballet company. I think it was just because we weren't doing any strength training. Now that I've got my butt-busting-DomestiGal workout to adhere to, my doctor told me last year I'm down to 17%. I'd applaud, except I watched some cheerleader MTV special the other day (reason #10 why I don't have a TV) where all these girls were getting screamed at for having body fat measurements of 13%.

Obviously I watched this episode with an overflowing bowl of buttered popcorn and beer.

Anyway, for some reason I feel like knee-fat-squeezing borders on being inhumane. Aside from all this, I'm just mad at Colossus for making me even more neurotic and checking every-other-glass-of-wine to see if the fat around my hefty-Asian-cankles has since expanded.


DomestiGal Sue

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